total war for total peace

TOTAL WAR is a military term, and it means throwing everything you have at an enemy. When I add this phrase to Total Peace, I simply mean to do anything you can for peace. At the same time, I do not believe that every time we take up arms, we are wrong. If this makes me a war monger, than ... And what would the people who are horrified of the possibilities of even using the word war in a positive statement? I SUPPOSE THAT IS NATURAL. Especially if you cannot trust your gov. This phrase is kind of like Peace Keeper Missiles, which have thus far worked, though they are hardly the preferred solution.

Not that I think we should ever build anymore bombs... the exact opposite should be happening, which would give us the moral ground when we try to stop other countries from obtaining bombs. There should be no bombs, not some status quo where the big three are afraid to give up any power, and no one, but no one, wants to back down altogether and trust their neighbors. How can we, in this post hitler world, not think that we need to watch for the rise of another dictator?

See, this is why politics and religion do not work. Religion is about absolutes, and there are none in politics. There are a lot of different sides that have to be considered as well as my own before I could ever have an opinionn on politics. On religion, I have been looking at everyone else's opinions on this topic my entire life, and found all of them to be wanting.

I logically went on think that the pholosophies of the future would come more from secular sources than ever before. I know novelists have had just as much effect on my as Christianity. A lot of the novels I read were merely retellings of the passion in out space, I see in retrospect, but I read everything. Along the way I stopped thinking we were ever going to understand much about ourselves or each other.... I kind of more or less wrote humanity off. Looked at the bombs and green house effect, heart the hate speaches from all corners of the globe, and kind of figured this shit is going to end bad. One way or another, this shit is going to end bad.


As a teenager, I was fairly certain there would be a nuclear war. I used to fantasize about what I would do, but I didn't have much of a plan. I hoped that the first strike would take me out and I would not have to try to survive in the aftermath.

Then, as the years passed and this somehow did not happen, I began to think that life was pointless. Suicide was much on my mind. There seemed so little to want to live for in my life. I was still getting used to being disabled at that point. Suddenly having to stay home, after spending so much time out in the streets driving a cab, was a level of hell. I adapted, and seven years later, while I still don't like it one bit, I somehow get myself out of bed everyday and write and paint sometimes.

I wish there was more said in all of these words I wrote today...
















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