waking up jesus: GENERAL ONCE CALLED SNIGGLY POO NOW WILL ANSWER ONLY TO hAMSTER KILLER, ESQUIRE (HE MAKES YOU PRONOUNCE IT ALL, TOO, AT THE THREAT OF DEATH BY DOG)

TRUE STORY:

WAKING UP JESUS

The ongoing story of Jesus waking up in Chicago, in the body of an agnostic writer,
who is nothing like the Son of God the right-wing Christians watching him expected.

You are welcome to share my work with a link bank... keep getting asked this...

Last time I was here, I told them I would not lead a revolution, that I was there to spread heresy. The crowds thinned. The day they killed me, I marched alone... This time I have returned to find Romes Soldiers Sleeping, content they have killed off the Troublesome Jew. I was surprised how bloody the Indiana boy became as my sword fell again and again ....

In the years since this story began in 2007, my secret fame has spread out from the halls of power that kept me secret all these years, as they waited for the Christ to finally wake up...

I try to imagine their anticipation.

Remember a dream I had in my twenties about running thru Chicago screaming that Christ was coming back, and man oh man was I happy... a cloud came through the middle of the skyscrapers above me, in the thin strip of blue above Dowtown State street, and I expected to see Christ... instead, just a bunch of musicians painted up like Ziggy stardust.

I surprised my keepers. They thought they had me figured out from the Bible. If that book could have told you everything, there would be no need at all for me.

Jesus: "I have become Known across this planet as a dangerous man with a growing force of hidden followers who value my orders more than life itself. A prophet of war. Once and future King in a court of shadows. Life and death in my hands every damn day. I ROAR, your most mighty shit themselves and run. I make myself a known threat, so I can try to negotiate what otherwise requires bullets and blood. I am here to free the enslaved in body and mind. I cannot be defeated. When the Will of God and The WILL OF THE PEOPLE ARE ONE, NO FORCE ON EARTH CAN STOP US!"

Monday, April 11, 2005

GENERAL ONCE CALLED SNIGGLY POO NOW WILL ANSWER ONLY TO hAMSTER KILLER, ESQUIRE (HE MAKES YOU PRONOUNCE IT ALL, TOO, AT THE THREAT OF DEATH BY DOG)

FLUFFY ONE WHO KILLS.

Sources close to the Pantopia Empire are said to be worried about the rising power of one of their herioc, charasmatic leaders. The General formerly known as Sniggly-Poo has run afoal of the government before by making radical statements like, "Soldiers should be able to decide where to fight." Now he is defying God himself by changing his name, a move that the government is afraid could spread to other hamsters, and cause them to lose their cover stories of being slavishly loving and controllable.

A source close to Pain is quoted as saying, "If that hamster gets in the way of Johnny's plan, the dog will be happy, that's all I can say."

Ruby dog and the kitty bum have been promised a special treat today, but still no word if this is related to the possibly treasonous behavior of Generaol Fluffy One Who Kills, or merely a can of tuna.